Literally meaning “sacred space or temple”. In Tantra, the vagina is the worshipped sacred part of the female body, which must be treated with care and respect. The Yoni massage is a sensuous form of bodywork that can build trust between the giver and receiver as well as connect the receiver to their inner sensual nature resulting in a feeling of complete well-being, satisfaction, and contentment.
Although the Yoni massage can be extremely stimulating, the purpose is not to bring the woman to orgasm. Rather, it is to relax the receiver and to bring emotions to the surface so that she is free to express her natural, powerful, orgasmic nature. The experiences and feelings that a woman may have during the Yoni massage can be very different, ranging from anger, lust, sadness, or even indifference. Everything is possible and everything is allowed. The Yoni massage is not about focusing on a special kind of feeling or fulfilling a particular expectation. The idea is simply to witness the receiver and to honor and respect her feminine nature as a divine Goddess.
Before beginning the massage, you should gaze into each other's eyes while embracing and engaging in deep, relaxed, synchronized breathing. By doing this, the giver and receiver connect on a deep level, creating openness and the ground on which the yoni massage will grow. Both the giver and receiver should remember to keep breathing deeply, slowly, and with relaxation during the entire process.
When you are both ready to begin the massage, the woman lies on her back with one pillow under her head and another under her hips to elevate her pelvis. She bends her knees and opens her legs to expose her Yoni. Sit comfortably between her legs with your legs crossed. You may wish to sit on a pillow or cushion.
Begin by massaging other parts of her body to encourage her to relax, start taking deeper breaths, and relax the muscles. Gently, but firmly, massage her legs, thighs, stomach, breasts and arms before venturing toward the Yoni. Next, massage the pubic bone area and then move down to the inner thigh area. With the right hand (the right hand is used to balance the polarity of Tantra), apply a high-quality oil or lubricant to the mound of the Yoni, pouring just enough so that it drips down the outer lips and covers the outside of the Yoni.
Gently rub the oil on the outer lips of the Yoni. With the thumb and index finger, gently squeeze each lip, sliding the fingers up and down the entire length of each lip. Then, carefully repeat this process with each inner lip of the vagina varying the pressure and speed of touch based on what feels right.
Next, gently stroke the clitoris in a circular motion, clockwise and counter-clockwise. Then, squeeze the clitoris between the thumb and index finger. Next, slowly and with great care, insert your middle finger into her Yoni. Very gently explore and massage the inside of the Yoni with your finger. Varying the speed and depth of your finger, feel inside the Yoni up, down and around. With your palm pointing upward and your finger inside your partner's Yoni, bend your finger to make contact with her G-spot, known as the "sacred spot" in Tantra.
Continue the massage, trying different speeds, pressures and motions. Keep breathing and gazing into each other's eyes. You may have powerful emotions come up and feel like crying, or burst out laughing. This is simply blocked energy being freed and is very healing. Just keep breathing as the massage continues. If orgasm occurs, continue breathing. Don’t hold back, yell, scream, release the energy and emotions. This is your safe healing time. And remember that breathing is very important to continually move the energy throughout the body. This also enhances the healing aspect of the yoni massage. More orgasms may occur, each gaining in intensity. In Tantra this is called "riding the wave." Many women can learn how to be multi-orgasmic with the Yoni massage and a patient, caring partner.
Keep massaging until she tells you to stop. Very slowly, gently, and mindfully, remove your hands. The Yoni massage creates a space for a woman to relax, and enter a state of high arousal and experience much pleasure from her Yoni. Allow her to just lie there, perhaps covering her with a blanket making a warm cocoon around her body, and letting her to enjoy the afterglow of the Yoni massage. This is a profound time of great peace as you experience the joy of being a witness to this special moment.
A liquid most treasured and revered in ancient Tantric and yogic texts. But what exactly is it and why do some women release it and others do not? Even modern medicine still isn’t exactly sure, much less in agreement. There is a good deal of mythology surrounding the biological reality of what has been only recently termed as “female ejaculation”.
We now know that there's more than one way to make a wet spot - in fact, there's a whole camp of doctors who believe that all women ejaculate when they have an orgasm. In one study from Florida State University in Tallahassee, 82 percent of women said they experienced a release of liquid at the moment of orgasm. Haven't noticed this yourself? "Since most women are lying on their backs during sex and the amount of fluid is so small [about a teaspoon], it sometimes doesn't come out," explains Beverly Whipple, professor at Rutgers University and president of the American Association of Sex Educators, Counselors and Therapists. "But research has demonstrated that all women do release a substance through the urethra that is not urine.""
So where does it come from?
There is a female counterpart to the male prostate; technically known as “Skene’s” glands. Just as in the male prostate, the ducts from these glands empty into the urethral canal. The liquid produced by the Skene’s glands is definitely not urine, but a thin clear fluid containing glucose and prostatic acid which is very similar to the makeup of semen, obviously without the sperm.
During sexual arousal the Skene’s glands may be stimulated in a way as to release secretions into the urethral canal. These secretions are ultimately expelled through the urethral opening (just as in male ejaculation). This fluid "release" is entirely unrelated to “vaginal” secretions, who’s primary, but not exclusive purpose is the lubrication of the vagina.
The Skene’s glands are smaller in size than the male prostate, and it would only seem logical to assume that the amount of “ejaculate” would also be less. The women seen ejaculating in mainstream adult movies are likely releasing liquid from their bladder rather than ejaculating. They fake their ejaculations just as they fake their orgasms. They are intentionally squirting liquid from their bladder to simulate orgasm and true female ejaculation, or rapidly expelling liquid that was previously injected inside their vagina. The proof of this is the shear volume and/or the white color of the liquid they expel. Anyway, regardless of the true quantity, it is a fact, that it is possible for women to ejaculate (squirt) prostatic fluid.
Where is this mysterious female prostate gland?
The Skene’s glands are embedded within the wall of the urethra, and can be indirectly felt through the upper vaginal wall, 2- 3 inches from the entrance to the vagina.
Using the pads of one or more fingers, it can best be identified as area of ridges behind the pubic bone. The center of this ridged surface, about the size of a dime to half dollar, is known as the Graffenberg spot or G-spot. During arousal the G-spot (which is made of erectile tissue) fills with blood and swells to 2-3 times its normal size. After arousal it is usually more easily identified and stimulated. Not all women are sensitive to stimulation or find it pleasurable. Since indirect pressure is applied to the bladder, some woman will feel the sensation to urinate. Breaking this psychological barrier makes it possible for some women to expel prostatic fluid, as a direct result of simultaneous stimulation of the G-spot and muscle contractions surrounding the urethra.
For a woman seeking to stimulate this area on her own, you can do so in a squatting position or lying on your back with your knees raised and inserting your middle finger into your vagina in an inverted "come hither" motion. A curved toy can also be used, however because the G-spot responds to pressure, not vibration, it would be recommended to use battery-less toy. During sex, rear entry is recommended. Unlike the currently widely accepted missionary position (face to face), rear entry has the advantage of exerting more direct pressure and stimulation onto the G-spot, by the penis. Secondly there is a greater chance of outward ejaculation (by the female), since the urethral canal is not compressed in a way as to inhibit the flow of fluid out of the urethral opening.
For those who desire to pursue the experience, the following points should be considered as essential for success.
Locating the G-spot. (1.5 – 2 inches along the upper wall of the vagina) Many men go right past it when working with their partners. Remember it is not very deep.
Work on developing strong PC (pubococcygeus) muscles. Well-toned PC muscles are crucial for those wanting to ejaculate as well as be multi-orgasmic.
Enjoying the sensations of G-spot stimulation and take your time. The G-spot is one of the most powerful emotional centers of the female body. Blocked feelings and thoughts can surface when working with the G-spot. So have patience as you open the flow of liquid as well as energy within the body.
Overcoming the fear of urinating, during arousal and G-spot stimulation. Emptying the bladder immediately prior to experience, since most women fear that they will urinate as soon as they relax their PC muscles. Remember it is only a fear, you will not urinate.
Don’t stress over it! By letting it go, you allow ejaculation to happen. Enjoy the pleasurable feelings and worship your body and the divine Goddess within.